29 Jun 2007

Global Warming Update


Eskimos Spot First Palm Tree

In an especially inarguable event that global warming is proceeding apace, a group of Eskimos noticed – while hunting for caribou on the sort of unusually balmy day that they’ve been experiencing with ever-growing frequency – a tree they were not familiar with, growing high above the tundra.

Priding themselves on knowing the flora and fauna of their land, they puzzled over the strange growth.

“Look,” one said, “a tree I never saw before.”

“No branches,” another one puzzled.

“Even a bear couldn’t climb it,” a third one noted.

Then one of them pointed to the groups of large roundish green objects in the high and odd-looking leaves, known in warmer climes as palm fronds. “Look,” he speculated, “big fruit, maybe.”

Just then one of the ovoid objects happened to break loose and fall toward them.

Unfortunately, for the fellow who had just identified it as fruit, the object hit him on the head and, being rather heavy and hard, it knocked him out.

When he awoke, he felt the lump on his head, and concluded, “Not very ripe.”

Respecting the environment, as all Eskimos are famously known to do, except when poaching, they decided not to chop the tree down to take it back via dogsled for identification but to settle for returning with the unidentified object that had hit their unsuspecting fellow villager on the noggin.

When they got back to their village, they went straight to the village elder, who was revered for many reasons, one of them being that he was the only resident of the village who, one year when the salmon catch had been especially bountiful, had managed to wangle a trip to Florida.

When he saw the strange object, his brows fretted and he looked up, saying, “I thought you went caribou hunting?”


“We did,” one of the hunters replied.

“I did not know that there are caribou in Florida,” he said, questioningly.

“Florida?” another hunter asked, now even more mystified.


“Yes, because as far as I know, this thing only grows in Florida. As you know, once, in my younger days, I went there for a mid-winter break.”

“Then you know what it is?” the fellow who had been hit on the head with it asked.

“Yes, he replied. “It’s called a coconut.”


“Coconut?” they variously puzzled, passing it around for another look.

“Yes,” the elder confirmed. “Where did you find it?”

“In a tree we never saw before.”


“And where did you see this tree?” the wizened man questioned.

“In caribou country,” one of the hunters affirmed.

“I swear,” another added.

“Then,” he told them, “thanks to global warming, our way of life is about to change. You have found a palm tree in Alaska.”

“Palm tree?” they wondered.

“Yes,” he said, and whacked the coconut with a large knife.


He savored a sip of the nectar within and, passing the coconut around so the hunters might experience the milky delectation, he concluded, "And so, if I live long enough, maybe I will get to enjoy the climate of Florida without having to make another trip there.”



26 Jun 2007

Nice Quotes...

Don't let someone become a priority in your life,
when you are just an option in their life...
Relationships work best when they are balanced.

Never explain yourself to any one.
Because the person who likes you doesn't need it,
and the person who dislikes you won't believe it.

When you keep saying you are busy,
then you are never free.
When you keep saying you have no time,
then you will never have time.
When you keep saying that you will do it tomorrow,
then your tomorrow will never come.

When we wake up in the morning, we have two simple choices.
Go back to sleep and dream or wake up and chase those dreams.
Choice is yours...

We make them cry who care for us.
We cry for those who never care for us.
And we care for those who will never cry for us.
This is the truth of life, its strange but true.
Once you realise this, its never too late to change.

Don't make promise when you are in joy.
Don't reply when you are sad.
Don't take decision when you are angry.
Think twice.., Act Wise.

Time is like a river.
You cannot touch the same water twice,
because the flow that has passed will never pass again.
Enjoy every moment of life...


25 Jun 2007

Best Practices for Humor in the Workplace

Most agree that humor in the workplace can have beneficial effects. Yet not all humor is good humor. The challenge: how to interject appropriate humor and fun into our serious jobs without hurting others or seriously undermining the company. When used appropriately, humor can work for you.

Humor that Uploads Also Uplifts
Humor has the power to make people feel special. When you include people in fun it
simultaneously improves morale, reduces stress and facilitates team building. With the prevalence of telecommuting and workgroups scattered geographically, the challenge of furthering working relationships, bonding and building camaraderie is real. At one San Francisco Bay Area company a workgroup staged an elaborate Remote Baby Shower. The expectant mother, who was out-of-state, called in for a pre-arranged conference call with her workgroup. When she did...surprise! Everyone was having a party in her honor. They uploaded digital photos of a decorated conference room and each other, and e-mailed sound files with well wishes. Everyone shared in the good cheer. This creative use of technology brought employees closer to each other, figuratively if not literally.

Humor That Brings People Together

Workplaces are full of opportunities to use humor for the benefit of all. Milestones are a natural place to employ humor. Dress like the recipient as a tribute during a surprise birthday party. Other celebrations to mark anniversaries, project completions or similar accomplishments are perfect opportunities to utilize humor. Even surviving certain projects is cause for celebration and fun.

Holidays are another natural time to employ humor. Halloween is a time for contests to see who can best decorate conference rooms; for other companies the anniversary of their founding is cause for celebration. Silly speeches, skits and spoofs abound.

And the Award Goes To...

Staging award ceremonies is a great way to have fun, recognize each other and revel in the shared work experience. Whether the categories mimic those found at the Oscars, Emmys or Tonys, or are derivative, esprit de corps rises when the team laughs at itself and each other. Best Supporting Actor, Best Impersonation of an Inanimate Object, Best Special Effects, Most Likely to Secede, or Lifetime Achievement Award.

Humor Is The Winning Ticket
Pranks can alternately be uplifting or uprooting. A desktop publisher, on April Fools Day, adorned his co-workers cars' windshields with mock yellow parking tickets, complete with envelopes for remittance. Upon closer inspection, these true-to-life replicas of tickets had whimsical offenses of significance to the recipients. The departmental joker's ticket cited him for "excessive use of farce" and the hard charging corporate counsel's infraction
charged him with a "Failure to Yield." Of course the initiator of the gag was later cited for impersonating an officer. Everyone laughed at the spoof once they realized it was a joke. Judge Judy's signature at the bottom of the ticket gave it away.

Pole Position
A fast growing company didn't have enough office space for full cubicles for its new hires. One unfortunate hire's assigned cubicle had a giant pole in its midst. To her credit she never complained. Co-workers felt for her. One night they hit the streets, collecting various fliers from telephone poles in their neighborhoods. The next day when the new hire reached her cubicle, the offending pole was now covered with notices about missing pets, renters seeking apartments, cheap movers for hire and even local GRE study groups. Not only did the employee know her co-workers felt her frustration, it bonded them as well as they pulled together to help one of their own.

One Person's Humor is Another Person's Horror

When targeting humor consider targeting yourself. Everyone has a different idea of what's funny and what's not. Many a well intentioned prank or joke has backfired. One co-worker sent another a prank letter impersonating a local media figure. The recipient mistook it for real, interpreted it as harassment and called the FBI. Oops!

The Benefits of Self-Effacing Humor

When we make fun of ourselves it actually demonstrates our healthy outlook, showing we don't take ourselves so seriously. As a result, we're regarded as more approachable and down to earth. Don't make fun of yourself excessively. Such humor loses its effectiveness with overuse.

Everyone from politicians to CEOs to Southwest Airlines flight attendants use self-deprecating humor - humor that makes fun of themselves - to get people laughing at, and consequently with them. You can too.

While gallows humor may feel appropriate during layoffs and cutbacks, strive to employ humor that uplifts and taps universal themes for best results. Here's to laughter!


by: Craig Harrison
About The Author
Since the age of eleven when he went door-to-door selling Used Jokes, Craig Harrison has been connecting with customers through humor. As a professional speaker and corporate trainer Craig Harrison's Expressions of Excellence provides sales and service solutions through speaking. Contact him at (888) 450-0664, through his website http://www.ExpressionsofExcellence.com or via e-mail: humor@craigspeaks.com.


13 Jun 2007

Get A Taste Of The Hot and Rapidly Aspiring Alexander Lunev’s Guitar & Keyboard Music - Finger Dancing At It’s Best!

This article is all about the incredible artist Alexander Lunev, who is about to take the International music scene by storm!

Musical Contribution Awards!
Alexander Lunev appeared at MTV's 13th annual European Music Awards contest to receive "Best Russian Act" nomination for RMA (Regional Music Awards), held in Copenhagen on November 2nd 2006 for his musical contribution with the dark pop song: "Never Let You Go" and sung by Dima Bilan. The show featured some of the biggest names in the music world including, Red Hot Chili Peppers, Keane, Snoop Dogg and Justin Timberlake who won best male and best pop award.

Virtuosity!

Russian musician and producer Alexander Lunev is arguably Russia’s leading contemporary composer. However, what makes him special is that he has a unique way of expressing his prodigious musical talents. Every melody is a sublime and exhilarating listening experience; that’s how enthralling and refreshing his sound is!

Unsigned Talent!
Incredibly though, Alexander Lunev is unsigned to any record label in the rest of Europe and America as yet, however, he is rapidly catching the attention of many important players in the music industry. Alex’s instrumental ambient type music is perhaps more akin to that of the famous Vangelis, whilst his methodically sequenced and lush electronic progressive genre is probably closer to that of Ryuichi Sakamoto.

Influential!
Alexander Lunev has collaborated with a number of singers effortlessly influencing all with his creative and unique sounds. Witness the energy and artistry of his compositions. This is definitely a music that can lift one to the highest state of melodic level. His compositions journey through a myriad of genres gently bathed in intricate, yet futuristic harmonies.

Inspiring!
Collaborating with the award-winning Dima Bilan, that magical talent was finally revealed captivating a huge global audience! Everybody will recognise the song "Never Let You Go" brilliantly composed by Alexander and superbly sung by Dima at the Eurovision 2006 that made it to number two before it shot up the single’s chart and became an instant smash hit in many countries. In February 2007 Dima Bilan will record two of Alexander’s compositions in Los Angeles with the producer of "Black Eyed Peas" who is very interested in Alexander’s music and he has plans to duet with the pop diva Shakira in the very near future.

Aspiring!
What separates and truly distinguishes Alexander from many other musical artists and composers are the absolute brilliant command he has over the guitar and keyboard! For those who have not yet heard the soundtrack from the movie "Ballet of the Butterflies" you may want to check that one out first on Lunev’s website http://www.lunev.info. However, for those who are already fans of the artistic brilliance that Lunev creates through his music like; "Through The Eyes Of The Eagle", "Following the Trail", "Above the Ocean", "Drowning Man", "Return to the Heavens", "Never Let You Go" (B. Bilan) and "Lady Flame" (B. Bilan), are definite must-have.

Creativity!

Complementing and pushing his sound creativity vision further, Alex, who is also musical producer for the group "Koroleva" ("Queen"), are together recording his latest composition titled "Snow" due to be released this Christmas. Alexander has contributed to two popular movie soundtracks, notably one for the Russian movie “Frenchman”. In addition, he wrote and produced the rock-opera "Prodigal Son" based on classical evangelic texts, further testimony of his boundless genius.

Dexterity!
The undeniably guitar virtuoso and talented keyboard player who can take any style of music and give it a special twist to suit, has excelled in a wide range of music styles rightly carving a name for himself in popular, orchestral and film music. His fan base age ranges from 13-25 year olds for his songs, while not surprisingly perhaps his sensational "electronica" collection captivates the over 21’s.


This year marked a truly significant step forward in the realm of electronic music delivering an astonishing musical repertoire like no other. Alexander new material is already popular in his adopted home city Moscow and boasts a loyal following ranging between 25 to over 80 year olds, further testimony of his fans wide age group musical taste appeal.

Forward!
Adding new material, Alexander reappeared this fall to pursue his interest in "world music" with an instrumental album titled "Through the Eyes of the Eagle" that strikes the head and grabs one’s soul. This album is scheduled for release in the very near future, but no firm date as yet.


Needless to say this pioneering composer and enormously talented artist is definitely poised for global stardom!

For more information or to get in touch with Alexander Lunev please contact Yan Valle or visit Alexander Lunev’s official website: http://www.lunev.info and listen to the latest music samples.

Contact Info:
Manager: Yan Valle

Phone: (+1 416) 877 5817
Email: info@lunev.info
URL: http://www.lunev.info


© by Lucy Boutaleb

8 Jun 2007

Attention All Tennis Fans...

ROGER TO PLAY PETE IN ASIA

Following press conferences in Kuala Lumpur (Malaysia) and Macao (China), IMG, the world's premier sports, entertainment and media company, confirmed that tennis Superstars Pete Sampras and Roger Federer have agreed to play each other in a Series of matches in three Asian cities in November.

The best-of-three set matches will be played on indoor carpet surfaces on November 20 (Tue) in a city to be announced at a later date, November 22 (Thu) in Kuala Lumpur and on November 24 (Sat) in Macao. The Malaysian match billed as the Merdeka International Tennis Challenge will be a tourism driven initiative held as part of the celebrations of Merdeka - the 50th anniversary of the Malaysia. The "Venetian Macao Tennis Showdown" will be title sponsored by the Venetian Macao Resort Hotel and take place at the Venetian Macao Resort Hotel's stunning new 15,000 seat arena.

Both players recently trained together in Los Angeles though they faced each other only once in professional match play, which was in the round of 16 at Wimbledon in 2001. Federer won that match in five sets 7-6 (9-7), 5-7, 6-4, 6-7 (2-7), 7-5.

Sampras retired from professional tennis five years ago after beating Andre Agassi to win the 2002 US Open and capture a record fourteenth singles Grand Slam title. During his career, Sampras won sixty-four top-level singles titles (including fourteen Grand Slams and eleven ATP Masters Series titles). He was ranked the World No. 1 for a record 286 weeks and was year-end No. 1 for a record six consecutive years from 1993 through 1998. He resumed training earlier this year and recently won Champions tournaments in Boston and in his native Greece. He remains undefeated and is on an eight match winning run.

Roger Federer is currently the #1 ranked player in the world and many experts and his own p
eers believe he may prove to be the greatest player in history. He has won ten Grand Slam men's singles titles in thirty-one appearances, three Tennis Masters Cup titles and thirteen Masters Series titles. In 2004, the Swiss became the first man since Mats Wilander in 1988 to win three of four Grand Slam singles tournaments in the same year. In 2006, he repeated this feat and became the first man in the open era to win at least ten singles tournaments in three consecutive years. He is also the only player to have won both the Wimbledon and U.S. Open singles titles in three consecutive years (2004-2006). In 2007, when Federer won his third Australian Open title, he became the only male player to have won three separate Grand Slam tournaments three times. There has been considerable speculation about Federer possibly becoming in 2007 the first player since Rod Laver in 1969 to win all four Grand Slam tournaments in the same calendar year.

Federer already has won the first Grand Slam tournament of this year, the Australian Open and he ended Rafael Nadal's 81 match record clay court winning streak, when he won the Hamburg Masters Series tournament.

Federer has been ranked No. 1 in the world since February 2, 2004 and holds the all-time record for most consecutive weeks as the top-ranked male player. On April 2, 2007 he was named Laureus World Sportsman of the Year for a record third consecutive time.

"We at IMG are excited to be putting together these matches featuring two of the greatest athletes of our time in three different Asian cities and look forward to some spectacular tennis entertainment come November," said Nick Freyer, Senior Vice President, IMG Tennis in Asia.

Latest News:-
Rafael Nadal rubber-stamped his status as the world's best claycourter by winning the French Open title on Sunday to once again ruin Roger Federer's bid to claim the only grand slam missing from his collection. By bringing the world number one to his knees with a 6-3 4-6 6-3 6-4 exhibition, Nadal followed Bjorn Borg to become only the second man in 93 years to clinch a hat-trick of trophies at Roland Garros.


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