21 Dec 2006

Puisi Suami Isteri...

Isteriku, jika engkau bumi, akulah matahari.
Aku akan menyinari mu kerana engkau mengharapkan sinaran dari ku.
Ingatlah bahtera yg kita kayuh, begitu penuh riak gelombang.
Aku pasti akan tetap menyinari bumi,
hingga kadang-kadang bumi terasa akan silauanku.
Lantas aku ingat satu hal bahawa Tuhan mencipta bukan hanya bumi,
malah ada planet lain yang juga mengharapkan sinaranku.
Lalu..
Relakanlah aku menyinari planet lain,
menyampaikan faedah adanya aku,
kerana sudah takdir Illahi sinaranku diperlukan diplanet lain...

Balasan Puisi Sang Isteri:-

Suamiku, andai kau memang mentari, sang surya yang memberi cahaya,

aku merelakan engkau berikan sinaranmu kepada segala planet yang

telah TUHAN ciptakan kerana mereka juga seperti aku perlukan cahaya mu

dan akupun juga tidak akan merasa kekurangan dengan sinaran mu...


AKAN TETAPIIIIIIII.. Bila kau hanya sejengkal lilin yang berkekuatan
5 watt sahaja,

jangan lah bermimpi untuk menyinari planet lain!!!

Kerana bilik tidur kita yang kecil pun belum sanggup kau terangi.

Lihatlah diri mu pada cermin kaca di sudut kamar kita,

di tengah remang-remang pancaran cahaya mu yang telah aku mengerti...

Cuba lihat siapa dirimu... MATAHARI atau lilin ?


please lah...!!!!!!

p.s. Ni puisi nak mintak izin kahwin lagi satu ni... :D

20 Dec 2006

At the President's office...


Just found this... thought you might have a laugh, too. :-)
********************
S: Secretary
P: President
C: Condi
********************

S: Mr. President, Condoleezza Rice is here to see you.
P: Good, send her in.
S: Yes, Sir.
(Condi comes in)
C: Good morning, Mr. President.
P: Oh, Condoleezza! Nice to see you. What's happening?
C: Well Mr. President, I have the report here about the new leader in China.
P: Great Condi. Lay it on me.
C: Mr. President, Hu is the new leader of China.
P: Well, that's what I want to know.
C: Well, that's what I'm telling you, Mr. President.
P: Well, that's what I'm asking you Condi. Who is the new leader of China?
C: Yes.
P: I mean the fellow's name.
C: Hu.
P: The guy in China.
C: Hu.
P: The new leader of China.
C: Hu.
P: The Chinaman!
C: Hu is leading China, Mr. President.
P: What are you asking me for?
C: I'm telling you Hu is leading China.
P: Well, I'm asking you, Condi. Who is leading China?
C: That's the man's name.
P: That's whose name?
C: Yes.
P: Will you or will you not tell me the name of the new leader of China?
C: Yes, Sir.
P: Yassir? Yassir Arafat is in China? I thought he was in the Middle East.
C: That's correct, Sir.
P: Then who is in China?
C: Yes, Sir.
P: Yassir is in China?
C: No, Sir.
P: Then who is?
C: Yes, Sir.
P: Yassir?
C: No, Sir.
P: Condi, you're starting to piss me off now and it's not 'cause you're black. Neither, I need to know the name of the new leader of China. So want you to get me the Secretary General of the United Nations on the phone.
C: Kofi Annan?
P: No, thanks. And Condi call me George. Stop with that ebonics crab.
C: You want Kofi?
P: No.
C: You don't want Kofi.
P: No. But now that you mention it, I could use a glass of milk. And then get me the U.N.
C: Yes, Sir.
P: Not Yassir! The guy at the United Nations.
C: Kofi?
P: Milk! Will you please make the call?
C: And call who?
P: Well, who is the guy at the U.N?
C: No, Hu is the guy in China.
P: Will you stay out of China!
C: Yes, Sir.
P: And stay out of the Middle East! Just get me the guy at the U.N.
C: Kofi.
P: All right! With cream and two sugars. Now get on the phone.
(Condi picks up the phone)
C: Hello, Rice here.
P: Rice? Good idea. And a couple of egg rolls too, Condi. Maybe we should send some to the guy in China. And the Middle East. Can you get Chinese food in the Middle East? I don't know.

19 Dec 2006

PETUA & AMALAN UNTUK KESIHATAN JANGKA PANJANG

Menurunkan Darah Tinggi
  • Minumlah air rebusan pokok Hempedu Bumi Pokok Cerita.
  • Minumlah air rebusan daun Pokok Ati-ati.
  • Makanlah biji buah Peria.
  • Makanlah pucuk Pokok Pala sebagai ulam.
  • Minumlah air rebusan Pokok Dukung Anak.
  • Minum air rebusan taugeh seminggu sekali. Air dan taugeh hendaklah sama nisbahnya.
  • Rebus daun pandan wangi secukupnya dengan dua gelas air. Biarkan hingga tinggal setengah gelas sahaja. Minum setiap pagi dan petang.
  • Makanlah 3 ulas bawang putih mentah. Jika tidak tahan baunya, bolehlah direbus.
  • Parutkan kunyit sebesar ibu jari. Perah airnya dan tambah dua sudu madu. Minum ramuan ini setiap pagi dan petang.
Juga Untuk Menurunkan Darah Tinggi
Ambil segenggam daun kucai, basuh bersih selepas itu masukkan kedalam mesin bersama dengan sedikit gula batu yang telah dihancurkan. Mesin sehingga lumat atau hancur ( jangan campur dengan air ) bagi mendapatkan patinya sahaja. Masukkan kedalam bekas mangkuk atau cawan, selepas itu embunkan sehingga pagi.Bila bangun pagi sebelum minum atau makan hendaklah diminum air pati daun kucai serta dengan selawat 3 kali. Amalkan selama tiga hari, selepas itu jumpalah doktor untuk buat pengesahan. Insyaalah darah tinggi akan jadi normal.

Menghilangkan Kencing Manis
Hari ini ramai dikalangan kita menghadapi masalah kencing manis tidak kira tua atau muda, lebih-lebih lagi dengan pemakanan kita pada hari ini yang semuanya manis-manis belaka. Jadi petua yang saya dapat ini agar dapat kita kongsi bersama-sama. Caranya mudah sahaja, iaitu dapatkan ubi kentang biasa rebus (tanpa garam atau bakar menggunakan oven) apabila dah kira cukup masak hidangkan untuk dimakan (sebelum tidur atau makan sebelah malam ataupun sebelah pagi). Rahsianya tentang ubi kentang ialah ianya bersifat menyerap segala yang manis dan masin berlebihan yang ada didalam badan. Contohnya apabila masakan seperti kari anda terlalu masin, lalu ubi kentang dimasukkan kedalam kari tadi dan hasilnya segala masin kari akan diserap oleh ubi kentang tersebut, Dan kalau boleh petua ini amalkan selama dua atau tiga minggu anda akan dapat perbezaan sekirannya anda menghadapi penyakit kencing manis dan orang yang sihat pun boleh mencuba sebagai pencegahan awal.

Mengurangkan dan Menghilangkan Sakit Gastrik
Jika anda kerap mengalami masalah gastrik ( pasti anda tidak mengambil makanan mengikut jadual), amalkan makan tepat pada masanya, contoh : jika makan tengahari anda pukul 12.00, begitu juga hendaknya pada hari-hari berikutnya tanpa berlengah. Lama-kelamaan... insyallah gastrik akan hilang... ia daripada pengalaman saya sendiri...kini gastrik tiada lagi!

Tajamkan Penglihatan
Amalkan hidup anda dengan meminum air suam setiap hari, mandi pada waktu subuh iaitu sewaktu bangun tidur dengan siramkan air dari hujung kaki hingga kepala. Makanlah buah-buahan seperti epal, anggur dan lobak putih serta banyakkan melihat pemandangan yang jauh dan serba hijau seperti pokok, dan selalu menghadap ke kiblat.

Melawaskan Kencing
Untuk melawaskan kencing, ambil beberapa biji lobak putih campur dengan batang kangkong bersama akarnya, direbus sekali. Selepas air itu menjadi suam, amalkan meminum ayer itu. InsyaAllah sekiranya seseorang itu baru hendak menjadi penyakit batu karang, ia akan memecahkan batu karang tersebut. Sekiranya tidak ada penyakit, ia mencegah dari mendapat penyakit batu karang.

Menurunkan Darah Tinggi
Untuk cepat menurunkan darah tinggi ketika diserang darah tinggi. Pertama buat dua rakaat solat hajat mohon pada Allah. Kedua ambil beberapa ulas bawang putih, mesin jadikan jus dan ambil 6 titik jus tadi di masukkan kedalan segelas air dan di minum 3 kali sehari, Insyaallah dengan izin Allah, selamat mencuba.

Menghilangkan Sakit Kencing Manis
Jika ada mengalami sakit kencing manis, sila ambil beberapa helai daun jarak rebus sehingga mendidih dan bersanguhlah/bertengkumus (bertengkumus maksudnya berselubung) selama setengah jam, sehingga badan berpeluh pada setiap pagi iaitu sebelum matahari terbit. (Semasa bersanguh/bertengkumus atau berselubung mestilah tanpa memakai baju). Dan amalkanlah selama satu bulan.

p.s. Moden tu moden jugak kesihatan tetap kena jaga. Remember... Fast Food Shorten Your Life! Hmmm... dalam filem SWITCH dia ada sebut ni... :D


Source: Naizatul Izma. TQ! :)

13 Dec 2006

FOUR KINDS OF PEOPLE ....

THERE ARE FOUR KINDS OF PEOPLE IN THE WORLD....

THOSE THAT LIKE YOU FOR THE RIGHT REASONS.
THOSE THAT LIKE YOU FOR THE WRONG REASONS.
THOSE THAT DON'T LIKE YOU FOR THE WRONG REASONS.
THOSE THAT DON'T LIKE YOU FOR THE RIGHT REASONS.

IT IS ONLY THE LAST GROUP YOU NEED TO WORRY ABOUT.


7 Dec 2006

Three Little Pigs


A teacher was reading the story of the Three Little Pigs to her class. She came to the part of the story where the first pig was trying to gather the building materials for his home.

She read, "and so the pig went up to the man with the wheelbarrow full of straw and said: 'Pardon me sir, but may I have some of that straw to build my house?"

The teacher paused then asked the class: "And what do you think the man said?"

One little boy raised his hand and said very matter-of-factly, "I think the man would have said: "Well, blow me! A talking pig!"

The teacher was unable to teach for the next 10 minutes.

6 Dec 2006

Road closure

Please be informed that several roads in Kuala Lumpur will be closed in stages during certain hours from the 12th to the 14th of December due to the 11th ASEAN Summit.

The roads would be closed in stages from 7.30am to 9.00am and from 7.30pm to 9.00pm.

The following roads will be affected:-

  • Jalan Ampang from Jalan Tun Razak to Jalan P.Ramlee
  • Jalan P.Ramlee
  • Jalan Sultan Ismail from Jalan Raja Abdullah to Jalan P.Ramlee
  • Jalan Sultan Ismail from Jalan Imbi to Jalan Raja Chulan
  • Jalan Raja Chulan from Jalan P.Ramlee to Jalan Bukit Bintang
  • Jalan Bukit Bintang from Jalan Imbi in front of LTAT building until Jalan Sultan Ismail in front of Lot 10
  • Jalan Kia Peng, Jalan Stonor and Jalan Binjai.
For further information and updates on Road Closure, you may contact the Traffic Police Department at 03-20729044 or the Traffic Control Center at 03-20268414.

5 Dec 2006

How does French mime Jerome Murat do his statue trick?

Watch till the end...




Although this has not been confirmed, I'm pretty sure he wears black under his costume and hence his head looks like it's not there with the black light on. The rest of it is just, he's really good at what he does.

4 Dec 2006

Facts about Bill Gates

1. Bill Gates earns US$250 every SECOND, that’s about US$20 Million a DAY and US$7.8 Billion a YEAR!

2. If he drops a thousand dollars, he won't even bother to pick it up because during the 4 seconds he picks it, he would’ve already earned it back.

3. The US national debt is about 5.62 trillion dollars, if Bill Gates were to pay the debt by himself; he will finish it in less then 10 years.


4. He can donate US$15 to everyone on earth but still be left with US$5 Million for his pocket money.

5. Michael Jordan is the highest paid athlete in US. If he doesn’t drink and eat, and keeps up his annual income i.e. US$30 Million, he’ll have to wait for 277 years to become as rich as Bill Gates is now.


6. If Bill Gates was a country, he would be the 37th richest country on earth.


7. If you change all of Bill Gates' money to US$1 notes , you can make a road from the earth to moon, 14 times back and forth.But you have to make that road non-stop for 1,400 years, and use a total of 713 BOEING 747 planes to transport all the money.


8. Bill Gates is 40 this year. If we assume that he will live for another 35 years, he has to spend US$6.78 Million per day to finish all his money before he goes to heaven.

Last but not the least the best one!!

9. If Microsoft Windows' users can claim US$1 for every time their computers hang because of Microsoft Windows, Bill Gates will be bankrupt in 3 years.


PS: If Mr. Gates read this I hope he can donate me about 3 million USD so I can quit my job, settle my debt buy a new home. I n my new home I'll install PCs running Windows Vista and networking them with Microsoft's IIS... So Mr. Gates will get some of his money back! :) What Say You?



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